Same old, same old

Christmas is obviously not alone in generating stress. It is just one giant example of how stress can develop and how it can be dealt with all year long.

Stress does not come from situations, events or holidays. It comes from what goes on inside your head when you think about these things. When you say to yourself, “I am responsible for the whole family’s Christmas happiness,” you are creating holiday stress for yourself. Everybody must play a role in the joy of the season, not just you.

The only Christmas happiness you are solely responsible for is your own. So, try saying this to yourself: “I am going to make wise choices this Christmas — for my happiness, and, God willing, for the happiness of all who interact with me from Advent through the Epiphany.”

Keep it simple

Get a small tree or just decorate the house without a tree. I have personally determined that mounting a dying tree in the living room is not that much different philosophically from having an inanimate artificial tree. In fact, the latter is safer.

Soft candlelight in each window also upstages excessive lighting all over the bushes.

How about easing your decision making by getting the same present for everyone? Years ago, our son made little one-decade rosaries for everyone, and I still have mine at my bedside.

Manage eating and drinking

Weight gain results from three things: selection, quantity and frequency. Plan for each of them. For example, you make a healthier cookie option (selection); commit to eating two per day (quantity); and eat them only when you are leaving the house, so you can’t go back 10 times for “just one more” (frequency).

Plan easy Christmas activities, rather than centering Christmas entirely around food, drink and presents. How about attending concerts, plays, movies and sports events focused on holiday themes. Anyone up for the Yuletide 10K?

Limit commercialism

The Christmas industry will try to convince you that you are lacking as a human being if you don’t spend, spend, spend.

This year, establish an understanding with family members regarding a spending limit on any one person, or for the whole holidays in general. When my wife and I were first married 54 years ago, the limit we set was $10. I still have that present from her to me; not sure that she has mine to her! A quick check of the government inflation calculator revealed that $10 in 1970 would be $83.28 today. I think she and I might still go with $10!

Instead of presents, do things together, like multiple family gatherings (maybe each with its own theme), rather than one big present-opening fest on Christmas day.

Another possibility is to dedicate all Christmas money to a family vacation over the holidays, limiting the presents to just little remembrances that are easily packed for the trip.

Christmas in service

Children are, of course, important at Christmastime. But, adults’ annual experience of Christmas is important, too. As far as kids go, we want to make our children happy, but just what is that happiness?

I don’t think happiness is embodied in an over-abundance of presents or getting anything and everything you want. Even with abundance, when everything isn’t perfect, frustration and depression can set in. Abundance also seems to send a bad message to kids regarding materialism, which is destined to make everyone unhappy eventually.

In contrast, give rather than get — not only things, but even give yourself away. How about the family, kids included, going through all their stuff and giving at least the excess to reputable thrift stores? It won’t be emulating exactly the “widow’s mite,” but it is a good start. Maybe you can identify a particular family that you can give to directly.

The family might consider a community project for the season. Instead of feeding yourselves, how about the whole family serving at the soup kitchen on Dec. 25?

Join the church choir in time for the Octave of Christmas services. Ask what other ministries you might serve to participate with your church during the season and through the New Year.

Lastly, while Christmas and children are a given, it is also a great time for adults to revive old memories of Christmas and share them with your kids. Of course, some memories will be of when you were a kid yourself, but many will be of your young married years, or anytime in your family life. An interesting question for all is, “What was your most treasured Christmas?” The answer won’t likely be the Christmas where you got the most presents.

Remember the meaning

Renew your faith during Advent to truly prepare for Christmas. We must realize that the Solemnity of the Nativity of Our Lord only begins the night of Dec. 24 and then extends 12 more days until Epiphany (Jan. 5 in 2025).

It is worthwhile considering Jesus’ circumstances on Christmas Day: placed in a humble manger for a crib; no tree, no stacks of presents or elaborate Christmas meal. However, the gifts did arrive later on the Epiphany. Wouldn’t it be something if we celebrated just Jesus’ birth on Christmas Day and for 12 days thereafter, and then shared presents on the celebration of Epiphany?

Let’s not be too quick to take down our trees and manger scenes. The celebration has just begun.